By Chukwuneta Oby
The practice of putting out your account details just because it’s your birthday is plain TACKY. Like a lot of things here, low manners are quick to become a trend. I have come across such posts from young friends on WhatsApp and I can’t explain how LOW I find that.
The worst are married women who have jumped on this nuisance-bandwagon. You long for an ice cream and a “who will buy for me” has to accompany that? You want yoghurt and someone has to buy it for you?
You want Shawarma, “who will buy for me.” I consider that absolute shamelessness. Not long ago, a human being on my contact list posted that she wanted chicken and begging, “that good friend” in her contact list to buy for her.
I have not stopped wondering what brain wavelength these people operate on. Can anybody be this shameless?
Some go as far as downloading pictures of clothes and shoes and then, set out to scout for “who will buy for me” with their sizes attached!
No, my dear, you are not being woke, free of funny. It’s tacky. It’s manner-less. It’s classless. IT IS LOW.
If your husband has SHAME, you are also embarrassing him.
Many of us have friends who do favours for us. But you must learn to go about these things without dragging your self-respect in the mud. If you need something you can’t afford, approach a friend or two whom you feel CAN do something about it, subject to their convenience, of course.
There’s also the option of not bothering about what you CANNOT afford at the moment. Frankly, there’s a very thin line between “feeling so free” and being a nuisance. People are not in your space to dance to your idiosyncrasies or risk being subjected to your tantrums about “fake friends.”
It’s an extremely INCONSIDERATE tendency. When people are not all over the place about their wants, it doesn’t mean they don’t lack. It’s just that the first thing SELF RESPECT teaches you is to contain your tendencies.
You can’t go far in the pursuit of personal fulfilment, if you are content with living the life of “who will buy me for me.’’
Sometimes, get yourself to do without what you cannot get for yourself. It’s a huge drive to work hard to give yourself the lifestyle you want.
Some months back, many people thought a young man was overreacting when his “Lagos celebrity” wife came on the social media to ask fans to buy her a particular designer dress.
The husband who couldn’t hide his resentment equally went online to tell the world that if she could go that low after ALL he does for her, she truly has no contentment. You really MUST NOT have what you desire, especially if you cannot afford it!
I raised this issue on social media and a friend’s response to the matter hit home.
He said “The type of question one asks, determines his or her quality of life. Compare these: “who will buy for me?” vs “how can I afford this?” Yes, the country is not giving many people a smile at the moment. And things are hard all over but that’s not a reason to leave your manners and self-respect behind in the gutters. Deliberately enable how you want others to handle you.
When you give a nuisance vibe, trust me, the average person will make mincemeat of what’s left of your esteem.
When you uphold your dignity, people even ascribe the virtues you don’t possess yet, to you. A lot in life is traded on the currency of energy. It is most important to be mindful of the energy that your space emits. This is because it attracts a like energy in return.
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